Rev. Lee… Exposed

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“This is a song about a very big, black, strong, sexy southern baptist minister,
who thinks that he’s got his program all together until he runs up against a lady
who shows him that he ain’t got it all together.His name is Rev. Doctor Lee…”

I grew up in the 70s, enjoying music and lyrics by everyone from Earth, Wind, and Fire to Janis Ian to Rufus featuring Chaka Khan. I was introduced to Roberta Flack by my parents, who were musical proponents and lovers of artists such as Miles Davis, Nancy Wilson, Sergio Mendes,  and Thelonius Monk. It did not take me long to attach my feelings to Roberta Flack, who was oh-so-natural in her artistic ability to express the vibe behind the words that she was given to sing.

I was introduced to “Rev. Lee” long before my experiences as a woman, and much longer than my ability to really know and understand the chemistry between a man and a woman. I was blessed to experience the meaning of marriage [as I knew it] between two loving adults, but my teenage understanding in the 70s (if that’s what you want to call it) was based on 2 working parents, dinner at 6 PM each night, and what I could order from the Sears catalog to decorate my home. I was not privy to the chemistry that exists between a man and a woman.

Chemistry goes far beyond lust, in that it is not just an innate attraction to someone based on their education, looks, and/or financial status.

According to Webster’s Dictionary, chemistry is “the complex emotional or psychological interaction between two people…” be it right or wrong, according to ethics or moral beliefs. I take it a step further and say that chemistry is undeniably tangible and difficult to understand… especially when it appears in life at the most obscene and inconvenient moment, which brings me beautifully back to Rev. Lee… a man chemically attracted to a woman outside of his belief structure.

Referring to his vexation as “ole Satan’s daughter,” he wrestled with his beliefs as a man of God and a messenger of the Almighty, based on the Holy Bible or his personal beliefs. But Rev. Lee could have wrestled with more than just a chemical attraction: the words point to any and every thing that a man struggles with on a daily basis, from addiction to needs to wants, and everything in between. “The Prayer of Rev. Lee” (my painting) depicts a man humbled to bring him to his knees and wanting to reattached himself to his Source of strength and supply.

Visit my website at: http://www.stefanivance.com.

This illustration pays homage to a song originally written by Gene McDaniel,
and made famous by Roberta Flack in the early 1970s.

They Need To Know

Okay, Ladies, let’s be honest with our men:

Single ladies: Are you doing what you do to gain love, or security?

Married ladies: Do we do what we do to be secure or because we love?

I need to be honest: I believe that most women do what we do to for security more than for love.

Before I met my husband, I was not seeing anyone. It had been a year before I latched onto my Man.

I decided that, no matter how it looked on the outside, I was going to be happy… for an entire year. My kids asked me incessantly to go on dates. But I was determined to love myself more than anyone else.

I gave my up my ransom when I met him. I reneged on my personal goals, which did not include asking permission for time for myself.

Since then, I learned my lesson, as did he. The respect is back, but I feel as though I am alone in this mission.

Ladies, can you tell our Brothers what and how they are missing out on their perfect woman?

I feel for our Brothers that want a relationship, but can’t find what they’re looking for. I believe that old school values don’t fit in with new school women… we’re not having it anymore.

Holla back, Ladies… Let them know what’s up!